Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
