do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
