i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Who died my cat blue again?
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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