yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
