Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
