I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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