My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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