just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
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