its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
