The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
