He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
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