Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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