One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize