Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize