Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize