yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize
