I hate all girls vehemently.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
