when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
