I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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