I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
