Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
