apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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