i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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