I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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