The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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