I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
