they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Randomize