CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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