On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Randomize
