I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
