just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
