im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
