My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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