I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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