She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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