I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Randomize
