You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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