one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
