TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
