1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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