I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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