I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
