i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
