i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Randomize
