Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
