things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
just tell him i said nine months
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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