we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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