She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
