He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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