At least make sure they are 18
Why
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
