i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
